Why Rebellious Teenagers are Actually a Good Thing

For most parents, it can be complicated to adjust to having a rebellious teenager in the house. You might even worry that your teen will eventually become law-breaking adults, and you’ll have to tell them I told you so from prison cells across the country. But don’t panic just yet!

Trust your instincts

Is your child being rebellious? How do you know? Every parent knows that teenage rebellion is inevitable. What we often don’t know is what makes our child unmanageable, and what do we do about it? Your first instinct might be to get angry or frustrated when you hear your teenager telling you they’re going out with their friends. But believe it or not, teenage rebellion can benefit them in ways that will help them in future relationships and work environments. Here’s how

Use visual aids

Use infographics, videos, or links to previous articles you have written. Remember – if you can’t explain something in simple terms, then your audience won’t be able to understand what you have to say. This is especially true when it comes to teenagers and teen rebellion. You need to explain things in a way that connects with them emotionally, or they won’t listen! That is why using visual aids can help with explaining how everyday teen rebellion helps teenagers grow up better in adulthood than those who were obedient teenagers. Your infographic could also include tips for parents on how they can help their children get through their rebellious years without having ongoing emotional issues, which may make them more challenging as adults.

Listen, then talk

You might think that being rebellious is a sign of poor parenting, but it’s normal for teenagers to resist authority. When you were in your teens, did you do everything your parents told you to do? As a parent, remember that bad behavior may be about something other than just misbehavior—what appears to be an intentional act of defiance may be more like an identity crisis. Reassure them and let them know they aren’t in trouble. They’re not doing anything wrong; it’s part of growing up.

Reassure them they are safe.

What is everyday teenage rebellion? - Know that normal teenage rebellion doesn’t mean you have to put up with any crazy behavior. If your teen is being so rebellious that they’re breaking the rules and staying out late, you might want to consider setting some new boundaries or at least putting your foot down on what you will accept. You should let them know that there will be repercussions if they continue in negative ways, but avoid making it so terrible that they would instead rebel than accept the consequences. Once again, it’s all about knowing when to respond and when not to (don’t escalate).

Reassure them they aren’t in trouble.

While it may be hard to do, try to reassure your teenager that you’re not upset with them. Remind them that you’re concerned about their safety and would like to help them learn how to drive more safely. Offer your support for any steps they want to take to address their driving issues and suggest ways they can get help if they need it. Remember that teens need boundaries, but if you keep things calm, they’ll likely take your words seriously.

Don’t get angry

Getting angry is only going to make things worse. A common misunderstanding of rebellious teenagers is that they’re trying to defy authority. In reality, teens rebel because they want their voices heard and their needs met. So instead of yelling at your kid, try asking open-ended questions about why they did what they did and how you can help them meet their needs in other ways. For example, I understand you didn’t like that curfew, but I need to have the structure right now. How can we find a curfew time that works for both of us? Keep things positive!

Don’t escalate the situation.

It’s normal for teenagers to try pushing boundaries and testing their parents, but it can be easy to react in anger when you feel your son or daughter is especially difficult. However, if you don’t respond with your aggression and instead communicate calmly what you expect from them and how they should behave, they might learn something. If they refuse to comply, that doesn’t mean they aren’t listening—it may just mean they are rebellious. It would help if you didn’t give up at that point; continue conversing with them until you find some common ground. Teenagers often reach out to their parents if they need help or want someone to listen.

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